Lyrics and Music by Christie Wilcox

 

I want to apologize if this isn't clear – it's nearing five am

and i'm really tired but really wired in a strange state of mind

where everything's simple but it's all this big riddle i can't solve

so I absolve my sins I'm giving in to song, and here's the start

 

I'm scared of life I'm scared of love, tell me why shouldn't I be?

I’ve never seen it work, where is that dream, where is that fantasy?

I say it's his fault, you know he did it wrong, so now it's hiding from me

but I'm hiding myself away from everything

 

I hide in the things I force so I can write about them when I’m real angry

I hide behind the words that hide what's really happening

 

And they say, Christie, go have fun, enjoy the sun, the moment's running away

He might not go if you had a backbone, just open your goddamned mouth and speak

but I'm weak when you're near me

oh please stay near me

 

Well what do you expect you're perfect you’re intelligent

in a way I'm so fucking dumb cuz I succumb to these confusions

these illusions I create so I stay safe and I can wait

and when he breaks it I can say that I'm good for nothing and no one

 

I hide in the songs I write about boys who lied you know they really hurt me

I hide in the songs I write that I know I'm only gonna sing to me

 

And they say Christie, don't give up, you're close enough, you could just reach out and touch it

he might not go if you’d had backbone, just opened your goddamned mouth to speak

but I'm weak when you're near me

so please stay near me

 

cuz I'm scared

I might need to hold your hand

cuz I'm scared

I might need to hold your hand

 

I hide by saying I'm so very strong and confident

I hide by making my voice and not who I am what’s evident

 

they say, Christie, don't give up, you're close enough, you could just reach out and touch it

he might not go if you’d had backbone, just opened your goddamned mouth to speak

but I’m weak when you're near me

so please stay near me

I know someday I’ll find my way, and I’ll be ready

Willing and able to turn the tables, I’ll find the words to speak

Though I’m weak

And you’re right beside me

then you’ll always stay…

then you’ll always stay…

then you'll always stay near me.